The push and pull effect

Lover of toxicity for punishment?

One thing Lagos people enjoy is toxicity. They delight in the joy of being wicked to each other. In fact, we usually compete in wickedness. You will be hearing things like, “you have not seen my true colours oo" or “that guy doesn't know I am wicked", and guess what, we truly live up to this toxicity. We are indeed wicked.

One thing we are so fond of dragging wickedness into, is our romantic relationships. Women would scream and curse at “Yoruba demons" like they don't relish the hurt. The toxicity fans the embers of romance. The push and pull effect is something we all suffer from. “If she doesn't text back I won't call", “If he doesn't beg for it, he is not ready”, but maybe we are all just not ready. Maybe we are all stalling because we are scared of real hurt. The one we don't prepare for. The one we don’t guard against with our armor of toxicity, of wickedness.

I enjoy the toxicity too. The uncertainty. “He loves me, he loves me not” playing it's sadistic melody along the strings of my heart. I push away warm, sweet affection. I laugh at sincere compliments. Then I run back to him. The one that makes me second guess my worth. The one that I am so sure loves me, the only way he can express it is of course by playing with my emotions.

We push and pull until we run out of thread. Not until we are tired, because we never get tired. We only run out of emotions, and when we are fully recharged, we rush back to that tiny thread like a moth drawn to a flame.

The point of today's letter?

I don't know, maybe give warm, sweet, true love a chance you soulless LAGOSIAN!

xoxo

Neerah💕